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How bad is it?

Hey man. I heard you got busted for a weed charge. Yeah, that’s right. Word gets around, huh? So what are you doing? Yeah, I know that too. Up early scouring the web looking for some answers I bet. Googling everything you can come up with about your weed charge to find out what’s gonna happen. How bad is it. What kind of time you gonna pull. All that horror show stuff.

 

Your weed charge don’t mean shit no more

Well let me put you at ease my man. I’ve been practicing law for better than 20 years here in north cackalacky and I can tell you from all that accumulated experience that your weed charge don’t mean shit no more. That’s right. Nada. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Goose egg. Now, don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying your weed charge should not be taken seriously, au contraire. And I’m not saying it’s perfectly fine to get busted for weed. Fact is there are still laws about weed and plenty of cops to enforce them (as you well know).

What I am saying is that, assuming you are an average guy (or gal) with no priors, and you got busted with a small amount, like less than half an ounce, the typical treatment in most state courts is that you ought to be given a “second chance.” What’s that? A sigh of relief? Cool. Take a great big breath now while I tell you: Most states have come to the realization that small marijuana offenses should not be punished severely, and have modified their law enforcement thinking accordingly. It has been found—in fact—that the cost of prosecuting the smaller varieties of weed charge is really too great given the “harm” (or lack of) that the offense itself presents. You must admit that this makes a lot of sense. With all the concern about the really bad stuff (crack, coke, smack, pills, and that bath salt shit that ought to be banned everywhere in the free world), a little amount of marijuana is just not the crime of the century anymore.

 

State deferral programs: considered a profit center…err…a better business model

Furthermore, it has been widely found by prosecuting authorities across the country that offering marijuana deferral programs instead of hard prosecution is really a better business model. Enter the deferral program. Now, instead of having to cop a plea and have a trial, you can enter into a program that will “educate you” on the evils of marijuana use and, in exchange, if you get through with no issues, the weed charge is dropped.

Big deal for the state, see? Now, little weed charges can be turned into money-makers for the states that used to lose big bucks chasing them down. How? By offering state-sanctioned “don’t smoke weed” classes (that you pay some company to participate in). By mandating that if you want your weed charge dismissed you have to submit to drug testing (that you pay some company to do). By making you do community service (free labor). By making you pay some amount of money to offset the cost of supervision while you’re in the deferral program (more payment).

 

Buy your way out of a conviction

Get it? So relax, it is now almost universal that the states have decided that rather than prosecute you you can essentially buy your way out of a conviction by participating in these bullshit pay-for programs that line the pockets of big corporations and seedy opportunist entrepreneurs who are in bed with politicians across this great land. So chum, buck up. First offenders who catch a weed charge can pretty much skate these days if they have some money. Hey, don’t you love equal justice for all?

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